It has come to our attention of a new, previously little known and acknowledged affliction spreading amongst the Archery fraternity with astonishing speed.
The new syndrome, GAS (Gear Acquisition Syndrome), manifests itself shortly after completing a Beginners Course and can last beyond the point when Archers hang up their bows. The syndrome can exhibit varying levels of severity, from Mild to Severe which can fluctuate over an Archers career.
Physical Symptoms of GAS
- Buying gear because it is shiny, often called the Magpie manifestation
- Seeing an archer on the field using a new or unusual item of gear and coveting that item
- Buying gear and sneaking it past the spouse into the Archery Bag of Holding or Magic Satchel
- Buying new gear to ensure you came back with something from the Archery Shop to justify the time spent chatting to the staff.
Short-Term and Long-Term Effects of GAS
The short-term effects of GAS may feel positive. In many cases, you may feel happy after completing a Gear trip. However, these feelings are often mixed with anxiety or guilt, and in most cases, the guilt or anxiety may propel you back to the shop for even more Gear shopping.
The long-term effects of GAS can vary in intensity and scope. Many GAS sufferers face financial problems, and they may become overwhelmed with debt. In some cases, they may buy new arrow sets frequently and run up huge credit card bill, but in other cases, they may take out a second mortgage on their home in order to obtain space to store all of their Gear purchases. GAS may strain relationships, when the time spent at archery shops eats in domestic duties or the family home becomes cluttered with new GAS purchases.
How do I know if I’m suffering from GAS
- Do you make frequent trips to Archery shops
- Do you keep having to buy more Archery Bags to store the gear you are buying – this could result in a downward spiral because as you buy more gear, you need to buy more gear to store the gear in.
- Do you frequently buy new gear to replace existing perfectly good functioning gear
- Are you browsing the web at all hours of the day and night looking for more gear to buy
- Do you lurk in Archery forums reading reviews of new gear.
Are there any Cures?
Regrettably the only known cure is to give up Archery and take up knitting. This undervalued hobby helps prevent spur of the moment trips to the local Archery shop and keeps the sufferer away from fellow addicts. Knitting also allows the GAS sufferer to remain in the family unit so that spouses can keep their eye GAS sufferers. Knitting needles can act as surrogate arrows, especially if bought in matching sets of twelve.
Professionals do exist to help alleviate the syndrome, but these usually hold surgeries in local archery shops which may “compound” the problem as stepping over the threshold to the Darkside may bring on anxiety attacks or temporary relapses of GAS.
Self Help Groups – these can usually be found at local archery clubs consisting of a handful of retired archers, usually male, who gather on weekday afternoons to drink tea, munch on biscuits and other comfort foods to discuss archery, pontificate on the latest compound releases, drool over members new Gear purchases and discuss rumours of new equipment and try to discourage members from new GAS trips. Occasionally, these Self Help Groups can deteriorate in GAS Dens, where members relapse and embark on a GAS Trip en-masse to sate get their GAS fix.
Alternately, there is a fledgling group, AGA (Archery GAS Anonymous) where sufferers can discuss their addiction in complete confidence without fear of ridicule by fellow archers.
Sadly, very few sufferers recover from GAS and it becomes a lifelong affliction. In later years GAS addicts bring out their old equipment to reminisce about days gone by when they could pull those 40lb bows and hits golds at a 100 yards. Regrettably, this reminiscing often brings on further bouts of GAS as archers attempt to relive their youth by buying new Gear as “Technology has moved on” and new gear will let me get those MB scores.
Thanks to The GAS Institute For afflicted archers for information used in this article.